I like situational comedy when people are being completely serious and yet you can find something extremely funny, not jokes.

I read 'The Rum Diary,' and I didn't really like it very much.

I think you're a good person or a todd by the age of eight.

I'm not a religious person, but I prefer God to money.

I've always been that contemptible thing, a luxury communist.

I've always felt that in a comedy script the stage directions should also have a comedic value.

If you are a junkyard dog, you assume that that's what life is: chained up, barking all day.

Isn't that the definition of a star? Someone who can get a film made?

Mostly in movies an actor has to come to a mark, an X, and deliver his line - but that's so artificial, that's not how people really behave.

My early life has given me a great deal to draw on, certainly - but would I have swapped a happy childhood for the writing? Yes.

My problem with being an actor was that I was far too shy to actually do it.

Well, I had the most appalling childhood.

Bernard Shaw said that when you copy yourself, you know you've got style. And I feel that if you can write like you write, then you are true to yourself. And it's not an easy thing to do - it's a disgustingly difficult thing to do.

I wake up most days with a vague feeling of doom - 'Dear God. Here I am again.' Then, when I read about politicians in the newspaper, the vengefulness starts. By mid-morning, the anxiety is kicking in.

When I was writing 'Withnail,' I was so busted flat that I had one lightbulb that I would carry around the house with me. I mean, really. No furniture, no money, and I was hoping to be an actor, but I could never get a job.