The golden rule is that there are no golden rules.

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

Success does not consist in never making mistakes but in never making the same one a second time.

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

If women were particular about men's characters, they would never get married at all.

A gentleman is one who puts more into the world than he takes out.

Without art, the crudeness of reality would make the world unbearable.

Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

Animals are my friends... and I don't eat my friends.

Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections, and conceal your own.

Take care to get what you like or you will be forced to like what you get.

Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not?

There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it.

Science never solves a problem without creating ten more.

Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else.

It is a curious sensation: the sort of pain that goes mercifully beyond our powers of feeling. When your heart is broken, your boats are burned: nothing matters any more. It is the end of happiness and the beginning of peace.

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.

The only service a friend can really render is to keep up your courage by holding up to you a mirror in which you can see a noble image of yourself.