Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.

Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say 'when.'

It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.

She had a penetrating sort of laugh. Rather like a train going into a tunnel.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Flowers are happy things.

I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I suppose.

The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

To find a man's true character, play golf with him.

Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character.

Every author really wants to have letters printed in the papers. Unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels.

Few of them were to be trusted within reach of a trowel and a pile of bricks.

Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.

Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

He was a tubby little chap who looked as if he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say 'when!'